The Roommate from Hell

I’ve often thought that getting a roommate would really help improve my quality of life. Right now, I live alone in what I like to affectionately call “my shoebox,” a tiny studio apartment in New York City for which I pay a fortune every month. A roommate would be such a great addition to my daily life. Not only would I have a friend to hang out with after work and on the weekends, but I’d also be able to cut my bills and my chores in half. Plus, I could finally afford to get a bigger, better apartment in a more exciting neighborhood! However, I am scared to death that I will end up with one of those infamous "Single White Female"-type of roommates; you know, the roommate who parties all night long and doesn't pay the rent on time. Although I've never lived with a 'roommate from hell', I've known plenty of people who’ve had their share of inconsiderate and truly weird roommates.


Before we get down to the nitty gritty of what defines the Roommate from Hell and what to do should you end up with one, let's examine some of the downsides to sharing your home with a roommate. Most notably, you will lose a certain sense of privacy in the shared rooms such as the kitchen, bathroom, and living room. This could be even more of an issue if you and your roommate have small living quarters, which is common in the larger cities such as New York or Chicago. But if you establish a good relationship with your roommate early on, then you can work through any problems that arise. Key piece of advice: Good communication is a must if you want to prevent ending up with a bad roommate.


You are probably thinking that someone who ends up with a horrible roommate should have done a better job of screening roommate applicants. However, you might be surprised to learn that most inconsiderate roommates end up being close friends who decide to live together. You might think that since two people get along so well and are such good friends, that living together would add to their relationship, rather than destroy it. But people who are compatible at bars and sporting events or even at the office do not always work as great roommates. No matter whether you choose to live with a friend you've known forever or a total stranger, you need to communicate early on with your roommate. That way if a troublesome situation occurs that threatens your state of bliss at home, you will feel comfortable addressing it.

Prevention Tactics

So how do you spot the Roommate from Hell and avoid her? Think beyond the obvious answers, such as meeting someone briefly for coffee or reading over their application form. Asking if a potential roommate likes pop music or black olives on their pizza doesn’t cut it; you won't get get below the surface area of compatibility. It’s great that you are looking for someone who likes the same things you like, but you need to know what kind of questions to ask to see if someone is responsible and respectful in addition to being fun and like-minded. Do they have a stable income? Any credit problems? Do they work at night and need to sleep during the day? Do they have a girlfriend or boyfriend, and will that person be spending a lot of time at the apartment? Do they have references from past roommates? These questions may seem like a buzz-kill for what should be an enjoyable process, but signing a lease with someone is serious commitment and these questions can help you avoid choosing a potential demon-roommate possessed with making your life a living hell.


Once you’ve chosen the person you want to live with you need to set up rules and boundaries before you sign the lease. You need to find out if you and your new roommate share the same general ideas about how to handle chores, pay bills, deal with guests, particularly overnight guests. Talk about what the bathroom schedule will be like. Discuss if you will share things like groceries or even shampoo, or tell your potential roommate if you prefer to keep things separate. Talk about boundaries for your bedrooms and whether or not there can be smoking in the apartment. Find out if your roommate is an early-riser or a night owl, and if you and your roommate are not totally compatible, set some rules about how loud the TV and music can be at certain hours of the day. Seriously consider signing a roommate agreement form, which is an informal document which purpose is to set these general rules in writing. A lot of things don’t need to be set in stone, but you at least need to start talking about what you expect of each other before you move in. Once both your names are on that lease, you are stuck together for at least a year, and that can be a very long time if your new roommate turns out to be that Roommate from Hell.